Skip to content

How to parent smarter not harder.

View all articles

Thinking Parenting Blog

“I don’t like my daughter’s friends”

This short video was inspired by an email I received from a parent with the subject heading “I don’t like my daughter’s friends”. There were a lot more details in the email, but the phrase struck me for its honesty. I know lots of parents have the same thought (even if we might express it in more convoluted ways).

You may have heard me say it before but the problem with parents is that we think we’re right. Often we are right. However, when we reach a conclusion about something that our child then has to implement, we find ourselves in the tricky position of trying to direct their choices and behaviour. And when it comes to friends, they often just won’t listen to us.

A much more useful approach is to do some ‘wondering out loud together’. To step back from that judgement (“I don’t like my daughter’s friends”) and explore with our child what they understand about those friendships, what they like about those unlikable friends.

Here’s how ⇓

Other resources you might find useful:

photo of two teenage girls to illustrate advice for parent who says "I don't like my daughter's friends"

Share this article:

The Work/Parent Switch.

By Anita Cleare

Not sure where to start?

Practical tips on how to be the parent your child needs and create happy family dynamics (but still do your job!)

Comments are closed.

Related Articles

photo of young boy playing with a pink doll's house to illustrate article on why diverse and inclusive toys are important

Why diverse and inclusive toys are important

Albert Einstein famously said that play is the highest form of research. Play is how young children learn about the world and make sense of it. The information children collect through play informs...

Young child wearing sunglasses and smiling on a beach with sand falling off their spade in the wind to illustrate article on helping children learn to fail positively

Helping children learn to fail positively

Perfectionism is not helpful for children’s learning. Children with perfectionist tendencies will often avoid challenges due to fear of failure, or they may abandon tasks due to frustration and...

Close up photograph of 7-year-old boy reading a book intently, to illustrate article on How to encourage your child to read books

Encouraging your child to read books: what works?

We all know how important it is to encourage our child to read books. Reading for pleasure is associated with many benefits in later childhood, including higher attainment scores at school, a broader...

Photo of smiling teenage girl in the mountains to illustrate article on 10 ideas for tempting teens off tech in the school holidays

Top 10 ideas for tempting teens off tech in the school holidays

School holidays can be a nightmare for parents of teenagers. Teens are too old to be parked in childcare but they can’t always be trusted to make great decisions about how they spend their...